


Bobby In The Middle

by Aaronna, NimbleShrillSphinx



Series: SuperWho Canton|Crowley One-Shots [2]
Category: Doctor Who, Supernatural
Genre: A Deal Is A Deal, Canton was "Blessed" man, Crowley and That Picture of Him Kissing Bobby, Crowley stirring up Drama, Dick the Leviathan mentioned, F/M, M/M, Other, Possessed Lovers Club, Protective Bobby Singer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-28
Updated: 2018-04-28
Packaged: 2019-04-28 20:04:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,235
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14456727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aaronna/pseuds/Aaronna, https://archiveofourown.org/users/NimbleShrillSphinx/pseuds/NimbleShrillSphinx
Summary: Bobby meets Crowley and realizes he is wearing Rufus' long lost lover.





	Bobby In The Middle

**Author's Note:**

> Just so you know, the dialogue, if not from the show, were mostly from several late night chats with my friend nimbleshrillsphinx. We would say a line and the response and go back a forth like that. That is why there are cuss words in here. nimbleshrillsphinx wrote them and I used them verbatim in the story.

When Bobby first saw Crowley, his gut clenched. For that, there were two reasons: one, there was a bloody demon in his kitchen and two, the demon was the spitting image of Rufus’s lover from back in the 60s and 70s. Canton Something Delaware the 3rd had been his name. He had been a government agent but had been kicked out for trying to marry Rufus. After that he had worked for some publishing house and then for various authors as a writing agent out in New York.

 

If this was him, it was no wonder he had disappeared. When demons took hosts, they rarely stuck around where they nabbed the poor bastards. This was likely Canton stuck with a demon controlling him for decades. That fact make the hunter dislike the body stealing scumbag even more.

 

Due to both previously mentioned reasons, Bobby cocked his revolver. Rufus’s ex-boyfriend or not, you don’t let your guard down around a demon. Just look what happened with Ruby.

 

“Charming. That won’t work on me. Name’s Crowley. Maybe you’ve…”

 

The head Crossroads guy the boys had been working with?

 

“You’re Crowley?”

 

“In the flesh-- of a moderately successful Literary Agent out of New York.”

 

Yep, this was Rufus’ Canton. Just for that, Bobby shot Crowley...twice.

 

“Aah! I see you have heard of me. I liked this suit.”

 

For a split second, the man in the wheelchair wondered if the son of a bitch was talking about the clothes he was wearing or the man he was possessing, but from the way the demon plucked the cloth from his breast pocket to assess the damage to the jacket, he clearly liked the outfit more than the body.

 

This realization brought several questions to Bobby’s mind. Why had the King of the Crossroads picked an literal bookpusher of all people? Had Canton made a deal? Had the man alway had that accent?

 

Rufus had never mentioned it. Do hosts not age while possessed?

 

There was one thing he did know. He knew that there was no way he was going to let Rufus see the red eyed dick. He knew all too well what it was like to see the person you loved being used by a bloody demon. It had been Karen’s possession and death that had gotten the two of them to meet and the last thing Bobby wanted to do was add to Rufus’s pain. After all, it had been his fault the Turner girl had died back in Omaha.

 

Putting those thoughts to the back of his mind, Bobby mentally prepared himself for dealing with Crowley.

 

“What are you doing here?”

 

“Looking out for Crowley.”

 

Isn’t that what demons always did? Look out for themselves? What made this any different?

 

“Meaning...?”

 

“The boys are on to ring number 3, but we still need number 4. I’m here to help.”

 

Bobby rolled himself forward, forcing a look of mild ‘awe’ on his face while getting closer to his shotgun that was just inside the kitchen doorway.

 

“You know where Death is?”

 

“No. Haven’t the foggiest.”

 

Bobby didn’t hesitate to grab his shotgun, cock it, and aim it at Crowley. He wasn’t in the mood to deal with the arrogant git.

 

“Well, then get the hell off my property before I blast you so full of rock salt, you crap margaritas.”

 

“That’s a mite unfriendly, seeing as I could be getting you Death’s location in about the time it’d take you to reload.”

 

This demon sounded more like an idjit than the boys, and that took doing.

 

“You’re just gonna chat some demons up and hope they don’t recognize you?”

 

“God, no. That could get me killed. But there is this little spell that I know.”

 

A spell, that was just what they needed; what could possibly go wrong with that?

 

“That so?”

 

He hadn’t meant to sound quite so sarcastic, but he was an invalid, so he was allowed to bitch.

 

“Results are 100% guaranteed.”

 

Sure they were.

 

“Okay. Then why are you snake-oiling me?”

 

He had a good guess, but it would be better to hear it from the donkey’s mouth.

 

“Well, it’s a little bit...embarrassing. There’s this...technicality.”

 

There always was. Demons wouldn’t do anything unless they got a larger benefit than the person they were dealing with.

 

“Uh-huh.”

 

“I need a little something to get the magic going.”

 

“And what’s that?”

 

He knew the answer; he just needed the bastard to say it so he could shoot him again.

 

“You make a wish. I can give you anything you want, mate -- Up to and including Death’s coordinates. All I need is…”

 

“My soul.”

 

“I’ve done more with less. Let’s just say when they’re getting their Grammys, they shouldn’t all be thanking God. It’s worth it, Bobby. Think.”

 

“Okay. Here’s my counter.”

 

Bobby shoots Crowley with the shotgun, mentally smirking as the “King” gets flung back into the cabinets.

 

“Ow! Bloody hell! Feisty.”

 

The hunter was done dealing with the sleazy cur.

 

“Get out.”

 

“I’ll give it right back.”

 

Just how dumb did the demon think he was?

 

“You think I’m a natural-born idjit?”

 

“Quite the contrary. Look, you’re right to be suspicious. But I’m your ally. Enemy of my enemy and all that. I need the devil back in his stock. In fact, my delicate ass depends on it. I promise you -- temporary loan. I’ll give it...Right...Back.”

 

Bobby hated himself for it, but if he could get his soul back when it was done, he needed to do this.

 

He owed the boys this. He had practically raised them while their idjit father ran off to avenge their mother. John was a good hunter, but a crap dad. In a way, Sam and Dean where the kids him and Karen had never had. He had failed Karen, Rufus, John, and God knows how many other people, but he hated when he couldn’t take failing the boys.

 

“Fine, but I have two requests.”

 

“And what would they be?”

 

“Give me back the use of my legs and let the poor bastard you are possessing go.”

 

Bobby didn’t like the way the demon smiled at him when he said that.

 

“The first I can do, but I can’t give you the second one.”

 

“And why not?”

 

“Because, he wasn’t in here when I picked this piece of meat.”

 

“Balls…”

 

\---

 

Bobby was glad that he kept Rufus at arms length while they were dealing with the Scottish demon. Not that he wasn’t glad to get his help, but he really didn’t want the two to see each other. Rufus showing up with the not-so-dead Ōkami (thank goodness for not-so-broken woodchippers) had Bobby on edge more than Crowley holding onto his soul. And then again with the ring, it was almost as bad as Hell Hound’s breath. Almost.

 

And for a man who likes to drink Johnnie Walker Blue, it seemed odd that Rufus knew what Craig was and all its minor flavors like tobacco. And then there was the ties in Scotland, were they his contacts or had they been Canton’s? After all, after the FBI work, Canton had done that thing with Scotland Yard if Rufus was telling the truth.

 

Crowley’s boy was more than helpful in clearing up any mysteries behind the King of Hell. Sold his soul for a bigger piece. And he had the nerve to say that contacting Death to get the last piece of the puzzle to seal Lucifer in his old room was a waste. 

 

And Garven was sure his father was vain enough to pick a host with a member large than the one he had in life. Rufus did say that Canton was a blessed man. Maybe he meant in a different way than Bobby had taken it at the time. Hell if he was going to ask.

 

\---

 

Seeing Rufus during the whole Eve thing hadn’t been all that bad. The Canton/Crowley issue had been pushed to the background while Samuel was dealt with. Their talk before using the saw was hard and understandably tense. Bobby couldn’t blame Rufus for not being able to forgive him. He still couldn’t forgive himself for what had happened, so how was supposed to expect Rufus to? 

 

After he was no longer possessed by that stupid worm and looking at him friend’s dead body, all he could think about was that this was his fault. Again. Why couldn’t he have just listened all those years ago in Omaha? Why hadn’t he told Rufus about Delaware being Crowley’s meatsuit? Their relationship had too many regrets. At least he could lay him to rest the way he wanted, even if it wasn’t the Hunter’s way.

 

When they were burying Rufus, a thought came to him. Maybe, just maybe the god awful universe let his friend be with his family and long lost lover. As he took a swig of Johnnie Walker Blue, he sent off a prayer to any angel who would listen to let those two get closure. They deserved it.

 

\---

 

He was almost dead. He knew it. Dick had got him in the head. You don’t walk away from something like that. Hell, he’d have had longer with his soul in Crowley’s pocket. Who knew where he would end up. He had done his fair share of killing, drinking, lying. But he had done good too. 

 

Bobby knew he was an idjit for avoiding his reaper. He wasn’t dumb. He just needed to know that the boys were safe and taking down those biblical “ sea monsters”. There had to some several thousand year old joke going there. To keep those idjits safe, he needed to give them one last bit of knowledge.

 

Getting to say bye to the boys was a plus and was all he could have asked for. Well, that or John to get his heavenly ass in gear and get him a miracle for taking care of his kids for him, but John always had been a selfish, self righteous bastard. He’d settle for Dean’s smile and Sam’s hopeful look. Things like that were worth more than gold.

 

He hadn’t expected to end up bound to his old flask once the memory of the boys arguing over movie snacks and the house had faded. At least it kept him around the boys, who sure as Hell still needed him. Then they saw him. 

 

Between him and Annie, they had had everything ready for Sam and Dean to torch. He just hadn’t thought that they would see him. It felt good talking with them again. Those boys were dumb on many levels, but they were his idjits and he wouldn’t trade for all the brains in the world.

 

They couldn’t alway see him, which was a good thing give how many times he wanted to tell them off. It took time for them to make their way back to his house, their’s now. 

And seeing as he had never expected to see Rufus hanging out in the house with Crowley or the ghost twin of the demon, he was glad the boys were clueless to the fact he wasn’t the only ghost hanging around the place.

 

“How the hell are you here Rufus? Are any of these wards worth squat?”

 

“Hell if I know. You buried me, right? I ain’t supposed to be here. No reaper, no angel, no demon. Just stuck wandering around.”

 

“Yeah, that might have been my fault.”

 

Well, that answered the accent question.

 

“I may have made a slight deal with the demon Crowley, after he ran off with my body.”

 

“After? Don’t those usually happen before they take a freakin’ joyride?”

 

“It is a long story, but the main points are I got hit by a car on my way home, man kept on going. I was suddenly outside of my body, looking down on it. I figured I was as good as dead, so I walked home to see Rue here before I passed on. He wasn’t there and then I feel my body moving by itself. I waited for Rue to get home, but then the demon started jacking himself off in my body! I followed the pull of my body back into the city only for the pull to disappear. I went back home again and followed Rue for a few years before I felt my body again. I got there in time to see myself kiss a dame before my body just blinked out of existence. I followed it around for the next few decades, popping back to check on Rue every now and then, for a few decades. I got up dates on who the body snatcher was from ghosts here and there and the son was especially chatty. I then figured out a way to tap into the other senses of my body. I waited until the day of the dead to reclaim what was mine. Then I made a deal.”

 

“What did you ask for?”

 

“If you had your body back, why didn’t you come and find me?”

 

“Rue, I have been considered dead for nearly 40 years. I wasn’t used to having a body, much less things like eating, breathing, and sleeping. I made sure I got the better part of the deal. I was a FBI agent and a literary agent, I know my way around a contract.”

 

“I’ll ask again. What did you ask for? Seeing as Rufus never even saw his reaper, you must have pulled some weight.”

 

“Aw, no. That was the easy bit. I have him leasing the use of my body and got a few demands as back pay. All I said was I wanted to be reunited with Rue if he met an untimely death and that he was off limits to all takers. Demon have more power than most of them know.”

 

“How is that the easy part?”

 

“Lets just say I have over 30 years worth of ‘backpay’ and I held the upper hand in the negotiating. He is the King of Hell and he has a pack of Hellhounds. Asking for my boyfriend to be left alone was an easier deal”

 

\---

 

Since the boys were using the house to as base while they healed up from their last hunt, Bobby had plenty of time to catch up with his old friend and said friend’s long lost lover. They talker about Bobby for most of it, oddly enough. It was the second day in the house when it happened.

 

“Bollux. One was bad enough.” The demon smirked as Canoton rolled his eyes as Rufus and Bobby jumped.

 

“Crowley.” Bobby really wanted his shotgun right then.

 

“Long time no see, o’ body o’ mine.” Mr. Delaware seemed to be in good mood, even if the demon was in his body.

 

“This is the bastard who took you from me?!” Bobby wanted to roll his eyes at that. Rufus was slow on the uptake.

 

“Damn, all three at once. At least Moose and Squirrel can’t hear you all going on.” The King of Hell snorted in amusement as all three of them glanced around, as if checking to see if they had disturbed the dozing duo.

 

Bobby was the first to speak after that. “Why are you here Crowley? And how the hell do you keep getting past the wards?” 

 

“As I told you before, Bobby, my mother was a witch. I know all the loopholes and bypasses for your little ‘keep out’ signs.” He really needed to let the boys know about this. Later. Once they were a bit less broken.

 

“Wait. HE is the tongue guy? I caught a bit of your conversation with him. Hell of Kiss Bobby.” Bobby couldn’t help but groan internally at that. Damn that Canton.

 

“Wait, You kissed my man?” Bobby could hardly believe what he had just heard come out of his former mentor’s mouth. 

  
“I made a deal with a cross road demon. How did ya think we sealed the deal?” One word, Idjit.

 

“What the Hell?” Bobby finally gave in to the urge and rolled his eyes at Rufus.

 

“Don't tell me you are jealous over a kiss. You married a Woman and had Kids. If anyone has the right to be jealous, it’s me!” Now Delaware decided to bring that up?

 

“Only after you disappeared!” They had to have been together. Only married couples bicker like that.

 

"But your boy toy could still feel it. After all it's still his body." Aw, hell. Really Crowley?

 

Rufus shoots a glare at Crowley then turns on Canton with a betrayed look laced with anger.

 

“Used tongue too. Not half bad.” Bobby wished he could shoot the demon for that comment.

 

“Oh SHIT.” Canton seemed to see what the red-eyed bastard was up to. Finally.

 

“What?” Rufus looked ready for murder.

 

“Now Rue, it's not like I WANTED to!” The love struck fool had his hands up and everything trying to calm him down.

 

"Ooh, I sense drama." The demon was sipping on craig and watching them like it was his own private soap opera.

 

"Shut up, Fergus" "Shut up, Demon" “Can it, Crowley” Canton, Rufus, and Bobby said in unison and Bobby was surprised to know that Canton knew the demon’s real name.

 

“I have pictures. If that would make this all more entertaining.” The bastard was al but grinning.

 

“Dammit! I told you to delete that!” Balls.

  
Rufus sputtered and looks at Canton who pretends to be VERY interested in the wall for a moment before breaking under the combined stares and defended himself. "It was for a deal! I told him he was allowed to make deals! You can't be jealous over that! And Crowley! Why do you still have that picture of you and Bobby kissing? ”

 

“Of course I kept it. It's my contact photo for Bobby” Crowley pulled out his phone and showed them before wagging his eyebrows at Bobby.

 

“Bite me.” Bobby was in no mood to deal with that and an angry Rufus Turner.

 

“I would, but I charge for each observer. You can’t afford me.” Damn that demon.

 

“What the Hell?” Rufus’ face was dark.

 

“Rue, don't look at me like that. I wasn't the one doing the kissing.” Canton was petting his former lovers arm comfortingly. As if that would work.

  
  
“Sure, but you ARE the one shoving that it happened in my face.” That was enough. Bobby had better things to do that listen to those two spat.

 

“Why the Hell am I still here? I'm just going to be leaving now. Make sure the boys haven’t died for each other. Again.” 

 

He was almost out of the room when Canton called out, “Not so fast, Singer. I know about your secret about being a huge fan of a certain blonde actress.”

 

Bobby could not help but sputter “How the Hell do you know about that?

 

“What?” Rufus seemed to calm down at that, his jealousy forgotten as he leaned forward to hear the dirt that was coming.

 

Bobby knew he was never going to live this down… But he might as well get it over with.

\---   
  


By the doorway, Crowley leaned back against the wall enjoying his Craig and the ongoing show. What was that line from that author who negotiated 50 years, 7 books, and a movie deal for her soul? Ah yes. ‘Mischief managed.’”

 

\---

  
  



End file.
